Montessori Radmoor

Communication Montessori Radmoor

I’ve recently been reading Megyn Kelly’s book Settle for More.  I had received this book as a present and really didn’t have much interest in reading it; however, I thought I would give it a shot. I am thankful that I did. Megyn Kelly is an extremely talented woman, successful journalist, and is highly influential.

The very first chapter of the book is entitled No False Praise.  This really resonated with me as a teacher and really had me thinking about parenting. “Be whoever you are. That person may (or may not) be extraordinary. We’re not going to lie to make you feel better, but we’ll love you no matter what. In our house, it wasn’t “You are special.” It was more like “You don’t seem that special so far, but we don’t care.” (pg. 11) These were the words that her parents used with her as a child.

At first, readings that, I felt as if her parents were not very nice, but I read on. “When I was growing up, I felt zero pressure to achieve. I mean zero. As a result, I was able to figure out for myself what I wanted to do and find my own motivation.” (pg. 11, 12) She goes on to say that she grew up happy and she is thankful for her parents’ honesty. She also goes on to attribute her success in her career, her independence, her sense of right and wrong, and more, to be from her parents and them not using false praise. 

From my perspective as an educator, she was able to develop her intrinsic motivation and follow her own passions. She was not driven by “Good job” or trophies, she was, and is, driven because she is motivated herself. 

These first few paragraphs are so powerful. They speak volumes to false praise and the idea of being honest and realistic to children. When your child brings home work, art, or even tells you a story, I challenge you to ask your children open ended questions about their work, ask them how they feel about their work, or just say “Thank you for sharing that”. Using words or phrases like that, or simply asking more about their work opens up so many doors for your child’s future rather than saying “Good job” or “I love your art work”. Get them thinking more about what it was that they did and allow them to build their interests. 

Sincerely,

Sara

Image Credit: The Huffington Post

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